| AA | American Airlines | Always Awful |
| | | Abort Abort |
| | | Alcoholics Anonymous |
| | | Amateurs Anonymous |
| | | A Miracle Each Rider Is Currently Alive Now |
| | | Airline Meals Eaten Regularly Induces Cramps And Nausea |
| AER LINGUS | | Arousing Erotic Randy Ladies In Nice Green Uniform Suits |
| AEROFLOT | | Aircraft Everywhere Run On Fuel Left Over By Tanks |
| AI | Air India | Allah Informed |
| | | Already Informed |
| | | An Interesting Ride, I'll Not Do It Again |
| AIR BC | | Air Burn & Crash |
| | | Air Bash & Crash |
| AIR LANKA | | Always Intended Return To Land And Not Kill Anyone |
| AIRBUS | Aircraft manufacturer | Airlines Impose Regrettable Bullshit Upon Us |
| ALIA | Royal Jordanian Airlines | Always Late In Arrival |
| ALITALIA | | Always Late In Takeoff Always Late In Arrival |
| | | Always Late In Transit, Always Late In Arrival |
| | | Air Line In Tokyo And Luggage In Amsterdam |
| | | Airplane Lands In Tokyo And Luggage In Atlanta |
| | | A Little Italian Tit And Lots Italitan Ass |
| | | A Little Italian Tradition And Lots Italian Attitude |
| ALM | Antillean Airlines | Always Late Machine |
| AMERICAN | | A Miracle Each Rider Is Currently Alive Now Airline Meals Eaten Regularly Induces Cramps and Nausea |
| ANA | All Nippon Airways | All New Aviators |
| ANSETT | | Any New Stewardess Expects Traumatic Temptations |
| | | Aircraft Nosewheel Stuck, Expect Tricky Touchdown |
| AOM | French Airlines | Airline Ohne Moneten |
| APSA | | Angry Peruvians Smashing Airplanes |
| ARIANA | Ariana Afghan Airlines | Afghans Really Into Always Neglecting Airplanes |
| ATA | American Trans Air | Americans Take Alternatives |
| | | Always Tardy Airlines |
| | | Alcoholics Transporting Alcoholics |
| ATI | Air Transport International | Alternative Take Iberia |
| AUA | Austrian Airlines | Aussteigen Umsteigen Autobus fahren |
| | | Almost Unknown Airline |
| | | Another Useless Airline |
| AWA | America West Airlines | Always Wasting Assets |
| BA | British Airways | Bloody Awful |
| | | Bad Attitude |
| | | British Apoplectic |
| BAA | British Airport Authority | Brits Against Aviation |
| BB / CTA | Balair / CTA | Black Box Cant Tell Anything |
| | | Bruggisser Alternative Luegt Au Id Röhre |
| BCAL | British Caledonian Air Lines | Better Crawl Across Lover |
| BEA | British European Airways | Bloody Expensive Airline |
| | | British Excuse for an Airline |
| | | Better Eat Afterwards |
| BOAC | British Overseas Airways Corp. | Better On A Camel |
| | | Blast Off And Crash |
| | | Book On Another Carrier |
| | | Bloody Old and Careless |
| | | Boeing Only Aircraft Club |
| | | Better Off At Caledonian |
| | | Bend Over Again Christine |
| BOEING | Aircraft manufacturer | Broken Off Engines In Numerous Gardens |
| BWIA | British West Indies Airways | But Will It Arrive |
| | | Best Women In the Air |
| | | Born to Wait In Airports |
| | | Better Walk If you're Able |
| | | Baggage Wandering In Africa |
| | | Britains Worst Investment Abroad |
| | | British Worst Investment Overseas |
| CA | China Airlines | Choose Another |
| CAA | Civil Aviation Authority | Campaign Against Aviation |
| CAAC | Civil Aviation Authority of China | Chinese Airline Always Canceled |
| | | China Airlines Almost (Always) Crashes |
| CAI | Canadian Airline International | Crash And Ignite |
| | | Call Attendants Idiots |
| | | Call Ambulance Immediately |
| | | Cruise Above Iceland |
| | | Circle Airport Indefinitely |
| | | Cancel Alaskan Itinerary |
| | | Check All Items |
| | | Copilots Are Imbeciles |
| | | Casual Atmosphere Inside |
| CPA | Canadian Pacific Airways | Can't Promise Anything |
| CSA | Czech Airlines | Czechs Screw Anything |
| DAN AIR | | Dangerous And Nearly Always Incredibly Rough |
| DELTA | | Didnt Even Leave The Airport |
| | | Don't Even Leave The Airport |
| | | Don't Ever Leave The Airport |
| | | Don't Even Let Them Aboard |
| | | Don't Ever Land There Again |
| | | Doesn't Ever Let Terrorists Aboard |
| | | Doesn't Everybody Like This Airline |
| | | Departures Extra-Late, Tardy Arrivals |
| | | Departing Even Later Than Anticipated |
| | | Drunken Engineers Land Too Abruptly |
| | | Damaged Engines Limit Take-off Ability |
| | | Directed Everybody's Luggage To Atlanta |
| | | Doesn't Experience Like This Andrenalise |
| EAA | Euro Aviation Academy | Even Apes Aviate |
| EAL | Eastern Air Lines | Eastern's Always Late |
| EDW | Edelweiss Air | Extreme Dangerous Wet-Lease |
| ELAL | Israel Airlines | Entführer Landen Als Leichen |
| | | Every Landing Always Late |
| | | Every Landing Always Lousy |
| | | Egyptian Louting Arab Loathing |
| | | Everyone's Luggage Always Lost |
| EMIRATES | | English Managed, Indian Run, A Thousand Ex-pats Suffering |
| FINNAIR | | Flies Ideally? Nah, Not Airborne In Reality |
| GARUDA | | Goes All Right Under Dutch Administration |
| | | Go And Relax Until Delay Announcement |
| GB AIR | Gribraltar Air | Getting Better Airways |
| GULF AIR | | Get Used to Late Flights - Aircraft In Repair |
| JAL | Japan Airlines | Just Arrives Late |
| | | Jets Along Lazily |
| | | Journey Always Late |
| JAT | Yugoslav Airlines | Joke About Time |
| JMC | | Just More Crap |
| KAL | Korean Air Lines | Karate After Lunch |
| KLM | | Keine Lust Mehr |
| | | Kommt Leider Morgen |
| | | Kauft Lookhead Majestät |
| | | Komische Landungs Methoden |
| | | Kiss Like Mad |
| | | Kindly Leave Money |
| | | Keep Loving Marijuana |
| | | Koop Lockheed Majesteit (Buy Lockheed, Your majesty) |
| LIAT | The Caribbean Airline | Late If At All |
| | | Leave Island Any Time |
| | | Luggage Is Always Tardy |
| | | Luggage In Another Terminal |
| | | Lost In-between Antigua, Trinidad |
| LOT | Polish Airlines | Last One There |
| | | Lots Of Troubles |
| | | Luggage On Tarmack |
| LTU | | Lauter Tunten Unterwegs |
| LUFTHANSA | | Let Us Fondle The Hostesses And Not Say Anything |
| | | Let Us Fuck The Hostess, Are No Steward Available |
| | | Let Us Fuck The Horses, Are No Stewardesses Available |
| MAS | Malaysian Airline System | Most Asians Sail |
| | | May Actually Shit |
| MEA | Middle East Airways | Monotonous Experience Always |
| NA | National Airways | Never Again |
| NWA | Northwest Airlines | Nation's Worst Airline |
| | | Nobody Out Ranks This Horrid, Worthless, Excruciatingly Sluggish Transport |
| OLYMPIC | Olympic Airways | Onassis Likes Your Money Paid In Cash |
| PA | Philippine Airways | Please Avoid |
| PAL | Philippine Airlines | Plane Always Late |
| | | Prick Always Long |
| | | Philippines Always Late |
| PAN AM | | Pilots Are Not A Must |
| | | Poor Airline Needs Any Money |
| | | Passengers Always Need A Mortician |
| | | Plan On Arriving Nervewracked And Mad |
| PIA | Pakistan International Airlines | Panic In Air |
| | | Perhaps I Arrive |
| | | Please Inform Allah |
| | | Pilot Ist Abgesprungen |
| | | Passenger's Illegal Abductor |
| PSA | Pacific Southwest Airlines | Poor Sailors Airline |
| | | Paul's Saturday Airline |
| PWA | Pacific Western Airlines | Pray While Aloft |
| | | Pete's Wobbly Airline |
| | | Piddly Widdly Airline |
| | | Please Wait Awhile |
| QANTAS | | Quite A Nice Trip, Any Survivors |
| | | Quite A Neat Trick, Arriving Safely |
| | | Queer And Nasty Types As Stewards |
| | | Queasy and Nauseous, Tired And Sick |
| | | Queers And Nancies Trained As Stewards |
| | | Quits Air-travel, Next Time Approaches Ship |
| | | Queers And Nymphomaniacs Trained As Stewards |
| | | Quick And Nasty Transportation, Australian Style |
| RYANAIR | | Running Your Ailing National Airline Into Receivership |
| SAA | South African Airlines | Suggest Another Airline |
| | | Service An Afterthought |
| | | Sensious Airborne Affair |
| SABENA | | Such A Bad Experience Never Again |
| | | Such A Bloody Experience Never Again |
| | | Such A Beautiful Experience Now Again |
| | | Select A Better European National Airline |
| SAHSA | Servicio Aero Honduras | Stay At Home, Stay Alive |
| SAS | Scandinavian Airlines System | Such A S*** |
| | | Sex And Service |
| | | Sex And Smörrebröd |
| | | Sex And Service |
| | | Sex And Satisfaction |
| | | Sex After Service |
| | | Sex Always Supplied |
| | | Sweet And Sexy |
| | | Service After Sex |
| | | Same As Sabena |
| | | Sit And Suffer |
| SATA | | Such a Terrible Airline |
| SIA | Singapore International Airlines | Sex In the Air |
| | | So Incredible, Aah |
| | | Singapore Imitates America |
| SWA | Swan Airlines | So wenig Auslastung |
| | | Swissair Wartet Ab |
| SWISS | | So What It's Still Swissair |
| SWISSAIR | | So Wunderful It Sounds, So Awful In Reality |
| | | Sexy Women In Swissair Service Are Indeed Rare |
| | | Sexy Women In Swissair Service Are Incredibly Raunchy |
| TAA | | Take Another Airline |
| TACA | | Take A/C Anywhere |
| | | Take A Chance Airline |
| | | Take A Coffin Along |
| | | Take Another Carrier Always |
| | | Tome Alcohol Cuanda Aborda |
| TAP | Air Portugal | Take A Pill |
| | | Take A Parachute |
| | | Take Another Plane |
| | | Try Another Airplane |
| TK / THY | Turkish Airlines | Triebwerke Kaputt |
| | | They Hate You |
| TNT | | Tomorrow Not Tonight |
| TRANSAVIA | | To Rape A New Stewardess After V1 Is Allowed |
| TWA | Trans World Airlines | This Was Awful |
| | | That Was Awful |
| | | That Was Accidental |
| | | Travel With Arabs |
| | | Tightwad Airlines |
| | | Travel Without Arrival |
| | | Travel With Alcohol |
| | | Travel With Arabs |
| | | Try With Another |
| | | Try Walk Across |
| | | Try Walking Asshole |
| | | Try Walking Again |
| | | Try Walking Across |
| | | The Worst Airline |
| | | Took Wrong Airline |
| | | Takeoff with another |
| | | Terrorist Welcome Aboard |
| | | Terrorists With Arms |
| | | Teenie Weenie Airlines |
| | | Traveling Without Air |
| | | Today's Worst Airline |
| | | Tomorrows Worst Airline |
| | | Tomorrow's Widebody Accident |
| | | Tomorrow We'll Arrive |
| | | Totally Wasted Airlines |
| | | Tiny Wings Aflappin |
| | | Time Waste Airlines |
| | | That Was Accidental |
| | | Thieves, Whores + Alcoholics |
| UA | United Airlines | Undress All |
| | | U Need Insurance That Exempts Death |
| | | Usually Not Inclined To Eliminate Disasters |
| US AIR | US Airways | Unfortunately Still Alleghany In Reality |
| | | Underwater Seats Available In Rear |
| | | Usually Stewardesses Are Irrationally Romantic |
| UTA | | Unlikely To Arrive |
| | | Unable To Ascend |
| | | Usually They're Around |
| VARIG | | Virgin's Are Rare In Glasgow |
| | | Voluptuous And Romantic In General |
| | | Voyage Awfully Rough Into Gringoland |
| VIRGIN | | Very Interesting Ride, Going Into Nymphos |